Borsch Day

Saturday, 9 June

We are coming to the realization that we’ll be leaving soon, which is met with both anticipation and panic. We’re not too worried about the “We’re gonna be parents” thing…that’s settling in well. The panic is actually related to shopping for souvenirs and packing them for the trip home. The chances are good that we’ll never be in Ukraine again, so we feel compelled to bring home the entire country in our suitcases.

Mark went out first thing this morning for another pass through a shopping area near our apartment. He found several things he wanted, and at least one he didn’t! A few days ago, he purchased some small items from a shop, and as he was gesticulating wildly to communicate what he needed without actually using any words, the woman looked at him and asked “Do you speak English?” He let out a huge sigh of relief and proceeded to get what he needed.

When he returned this morning, she was ready for him. She stopped him to chat, showed photos of her son, and explained that she had taught English in a small village for 6 years until they couldn’t afford to pay her anymore. As he started to leave, she begged “Oh, don’t go! Please stay.” Thinking she was just anxious to practice her English more, he chatted a little longer…until she saw his ring and exclaimed (with great disappointment) “Oh! You are married!”

He confirmed this, and she thought for a second or two, and then asked “Well, is your wife here with you?” Umm…and that would change WHAT? My wonderful husband then bid her farwell and returned to me. We’ve all been laughing at the story all day!

At 10, our driver picked us up and drove us the short ride into the town center. He dropped us off at the café (which is called Kaba +). The waitress recognized me as soon as we walked in, and had a cappuccino on our table in very short order. We reviewed our plan for the day until a young man walked up and asked us (in English) where we were from. Turns out that he is from Ukraine, but has been living in Ireland for the past two years. He and his girlfriend were here visiting his father.

We walked up through the park in the center of town. Since the weather was beautiful (again), Mark got several more photos of key spots as we strolled. We wandered to the mall next to Vivat Time, and found some more souvenirs before we walked back to Lisa’s apartment to meet up.

About to gnaw our own arms off, we bummed a snack off of Lisa before the driver and Kseniya arrived. Then we picked the girls up and drove to Amstor to get groceries. Today was Borsch Day! Kseniya had kindly agreed to come to our apartment and cook Ukrainian borsch for all of us. She also brought her DVD player so that we could let the girls watch a movie while we cooked.

We thought we were in for multiple meltdowns in Amstor; all three girls were getting a little edgy. Masha was demanding every item in the grocery store, including more fruit than anyone could possibly eat in a week. We got six apples of various colors, a bunch of bananas, an orange, and a peach. She was annoyed that I wouldn’t also buy strawberries and kiwis. We kept reminding her this was for *one afternoon,* but she was getting a little cranky, and so was Khrystyna. Even good-natured Amina was acting kinda tired, so we got through the checkout as quickly as possible, and headed back to the apartment.

Mark took the girls up in the elevator first, and Lisa, Kseniya, and I followed…we barely fit in the elevator in two groups. Mark set up the DVD player and showed Masha the videos that we had gotten for her. She was ecstatic when she saw the Barbie “Princess and the Pauper” movie that she had watched when she was in the US last summer, and she got the other girls to agree to watch it with her.

Meanwhile, Kseniya kicked it into high gear in the tiny kitchen. She found everything she was searching for, including the most bizzarre can opener I've ever seen, and she quickly had the borsch cooking. Lisa and I took detailed notes so that we can recreate it at home, and we all had a great time. The borsch was delicious! Masha, who claimed to not like borsch, ate some; Khrystyna and Amina, who claimed to like it, chose not to eat it. Hmmm…

Too soon, our time was up, and two cars were waiting outside our apartment. We dropped the girls back at the orphanage, and us at the internet café where I fixed the blog posts that were just going up as the power had gone out the other night…When we got back home, I had another bowl of borsch and went to bed.

Planning Update: We’ve learned that we cannot pick up Masha’s paperwork until Tuesday morning…we’ve been told that the last day of the 10-day waiting period must be a business day. So we’ll be leaving for the region capital on Tuesday morning and to Kiev on the train Tuesday night. Our facilitator Sasha (not Driver Sasha – it’s confusing) still thinks there’s a chance that we can get everything done in Kiev on Wednesday and get a flight on Thursday, but I’m not so sure about that….keep praying for us!

Это Мама, Это Папа

Friday, 8 June

This morning, I found Nirvana. Or at least as close as possible in this town. Mark and I rode into town around 10:00 this morning, dropped a couple of things off with Lisa, and then started walking around. The plan: buy some CDs, get Mark’s watch fixed, pick up some small gift bags and cards for the gifts we need to give on Monday.

The plan was modified when we discovered a Western-style café… I knew I was missing my coffee—tea has adequately provided my daily caffeine fix—but I didn’t realize how much until I spotted the shiny Italian cappuccino maker. Turns out, this place is only about a block from Fred and Lisa’s apartment, and it’s actually the place that we went for ice cream with the girls on the first day.

As they didn’t have giant to-go cups, Mark and I sat at a tall bistro table and had breakfast ! I drank the best cappuccino that I had consumed in my life; the waitress thought I was a little off when I asked for another. We also had a pastry filled with ham and cheese, and Mark had a glass pineapple juice.

Have we mentioned the juices? We had heard that fruits and juice were good here, but we quickly discovered that is an understatement. They have green apple juice that tastes just like you are biting into a crisp Granny Smith apple. And everywhere you go, they offer various sizes and flavors of juice. Adults walk down the street sucking on juice boxes. So do we, now. But I digress…

From the café, we walked the couple of blocks to the main shopping area, first visiting a CD shop that Mark had spotted on one of his many reconnaissance missions. The young man running the shop spoke a little English; we managed to go through my scary list of Russian music gleaned from the video channel and select 5 CDs that we liked and thought Masha might like as well. At $5 a piece, we will probably bring her back to select a few more.

I stopped into the internet café to send a couple of emergency emails out while Mark popped across the street to get his watch fixed, then we met back up in a small souvenir shop where we found the cutest hedgehog piggybank. I couldn’t live without it, so that went into the bag. At noon, we met up with Lisa and her driver to head to the orphanage.

As I’ve mentioned before, our time with the girls is getting a pretty routine. We picked them up, went to Vivat Time for lunch, went through some English flashcards, and then headed to Crocodile Park. Since we planned to go back to the café for ice cream after the park, the girls each got 15 grivna to spend on rides (that’s a whopping $3). Tucked behind the main ride area, the girls found a little playground enclosed by an iron fence covered in vines. It cost 1 grivna to enter, but the playground was large, and quiet.

They checked out a teeter totter and a slide you could fry an egg on before settling on a row of four swings. As they flew higher and higher, we heard them start singing “If You’re Happy and You Know It” in English! Lisa and I ran over and sang with them, launching into the Russian version that we learned in class. We all sang childhood songs as the girls glided back and forth on the swings, with Mark recording clips on the digital camera. The girls are really starting to open up around us.

Time finally came to leave, and the girls hit a couple of quick rides on the way out of the park. For the first time, they chose to not do the Crocodile! I’m sure that the poor crocodile lady felt sad to watch our little entourage run past without stopping. We suspect that she was counting on our support for her grandchildren’s college fund.

When we arrived at the café, the girls scarfed down their ice cream and asked for more food. Lisa had sandwiches leftover from lunch for Amina and Khrystyna, and I had an apple and some chips for Masha, and then Masha grabbed the camera to take pictures of the large fishtank in the café. She snapped a few photos, then switched to video.

Later in the evening, as we transferred the contents of the camera to the laptop and watched it all, tears of joy and laughter filled our eyes. The video clip begins with Masha introducing herself, and then walking through the café and out the doors. We giggled as she showed the car, announcing in a funny sing-song voice “Eta mya machine,” or “This is my car” and then the same for Amina and Khrystyna’s car. Then she turns toward of the café, where I’m coming out the door. “Eta Mama” as I lean toward the camera with a kissy-face. She then proceeds back inside and introduces “Papa.”

This is so special to us because, as I reported a while ago, she had been somewhat hesitating to call us “mama” and “papa.” The last couple of days, we’ve heard a couple more “ma” and “pa” from her…we’re joking that we’re Ma and Pa Kettle! We just think it’s a big step for her to see us as a natural part of her commentary!

She took quite a bit more video when we got back to the orphanage as the adults were making plans for tomorrow…there is even an interview with Vika, and then Vika took the camera and interviewed Masha. I think that Masha is destined for a career on one side or the other of a camera! We’ll try to get some of the best clips posted on YouTube after we get home…..

The Night The Lights Went Out In Com.bat

Thursday, 7 June

The cries of a thousand warriors filled the air as darkness enveloped their underground lair. OK, so it was more like about 40 teenage boys hollering when the power went out at Com.bat, the internet café we’ve been frequenting. The first version is so much more poetic, dontcha think?

Today’s internet time was nearing its end. Lisa was copying some photos, and I had just finished uploading the last couple of days’ posts (I hope), and I was preparing the email for distribution to y’all when, in an instant, the room went dark. Gone were the sounds of fans from 45 computers; once the initial moments of shock wore off, the boys began to quietly congregate around the front desk. Our laptop screens and provided the only illumination; and we got the heck outta Dodge before chaos erupted.

Other than that, the day was uneventful. Sasha, the leader of our facilitation team, was in town for a short time today…he arrived on the overnight train from Kiev this morning, and was out again with Fred on the 7:15 train to Kiev. We spent an hour at the notary getting Masha’s passport application completed, and spent a couple hours playing with the kids at the orphanage and then caught some dinner with Lisa before we all headed to the internet café.

We had been talking about sending the girls around the orphanage with the camera, and today it happened. The girls took the camera upstairs and got some photos of their rooms. Their group occupies two large rooms on the second floor of the orphanage. The girls posed in their beds, and we learned that Amina and Masha are bunkmates…Amina on top and Masha on the bottom bunk! They also have a study area with desks, a living room area with a pet bird, and of course Masha posed with her “best friend,” the big TV! We again were impressed with the quality of conditions at this orphanage, and we are thankful to the Director and her staff for taking such good care of all the children there.

Our patience and flexibility (and my snack supply) was tested again today, though. We spoke with Sasha at about 8:30, and he was on his way into town. He told us that we would need to do some paperwork today. We told him that we had an appointment with an artist at 1:00 and planned to go pick up Masha at 2:00, and he said “great. Good to know.” And that was the end of the conversation. He did not tell us when he needed us, or what specifically he needed us to do. We got about 30 minutes’ notice that our driver would be picking us up at 2:00 and taking us to the notary.

The only snag in this plan was that we were planning to take Masha to LUNCH at 2:00. We didn’t get out of the Notary until after 3:00, and then we needed to wait there for Sasha. Needless to say, we didn’t get food until about 5:30 (Masha ate at the orphanage). It’s times like this that remind us that this is NOT a vacation. We are here to accomplish an objective, and we are not in control of any of the activities. We have to trust our facilitation team, know that they are as motivated as us to get us out of here, and follow their lead. And I’m sure you can imagine how tough that is for both of us!

We also learned that we can’t leave the city with Masha until Tuesday morning, but Sasha believes that we may still be able to get home on Thursday. We won’t know until the middle of next week, but let’s all pray that everything goes quickly and smoothly and that we can get flights.

The Little Top

Wednesday, 6 June

It dawned on us this morning that our time in Ukraine is almost over; we only have five more days in town. On Monday morning, our 10-day waiting period will be over, and the court decree for our adoption will be final. We will be able to pick up all the court documents and then go to the orphanage and pick up our daughter!!!

From there, we will drive to the capital of the region to get Masha’s new birth certificate and passport, and she will officially be Maria Elizabeth Niles. We hope to get this completed on Monday so that we can take the train Monday night back to Kiev. In Kiev, Masha will have to have a medical exam and get some vaccinations required by US Immigration. Then we meet with the US Embassy to get her visa paperwork (usually a 1-2 day process) and then we board the plane home….

Please pray that we can get a flight on Friday or Saturday of next week, and that the fares are the same! Fred is heading back to the US tomorrow, and the first flight he tried to book for his return came up $1000 more than the ticket he was holding. He found a different flight that was only $200 more, but on top of change feed, that adds up. Further, we have to buy a new ticket for Masha for the same flights as well.

These are the things that are consuming our thoughts now…on one hand, our facilitator has everything under control and we don’t have to worry about anything, but on the other, there are a couple of final things that we DO have to worry about (like booking flights and packing and making sure we’ve purchased all the souvenirs that one could ever want) and we’re starting to get a little anxious.

This morning, we walked to a bookstore near our apartment and bought some more books for Masha, and a couple for me. I found a book of Russian tales, including Repka, a story I learned in Russian class about a very large turnip! I’m sure Masha will not be amused at my attempts to tell it….She is learning the English word for “embarrassed,” and she has mastered the teenage eye-roll.

We met up with Fred and Lisa and picked the girls up a little after noon for lunch and a walk in the park. We repeated the 20 grivna exercise; they could choose among two different bouncy-rides, ice cream, and an assortment toys from a street vendor. They ran past the vendor and straight to the bouncy ride. After some discussion, they decided to do the shorter, less expensive ride…a giant inflatable slide. These Ukrainians sure like their inflatable bouncy things!

When time was up, the girls hopped off and each bought an ice cream and then wandered over to the street vendor. They inspected the various toys hanging from his stand, asking how much each one cost. In the end, all three girls concluded that they would prefer to do another bouncy ride, and they left the stand empty-handed. Each ended the afternoon with 2-3 grivna left, which we all promised to hold for them.

We returned the tired girls to the orphanage early so they could rest up before the circus. We are finding that as the days wear on, they tire a little more quickly—I suspect that the stress of an unfamiliar routine and anxiety over the unknown of their new lives is wearing on them even more than it is us.

After we dropped the girls, Fred and Lisa piled into our car, and our driver Sasha took us to the circus grounds to buy tickets, then to Amstor for a couple of things…once we got in the store, we realized we could only get a couple things; both families were running VERY low on cash after the circus tickets. We all ended up borrowing from the kids’ leftover money to cover us at the checkout! DOH!

From Amstor, we stopped by our apartment to put a couple groceries in the refrigerator and pick up some more cash, then on to Fred and Lisa’s to do the same. From their place, we walked across the street to a bank to exchange money before they closed. Lisa also tried out an ATM (Bankomat), and found it worked great. It allowed her to choose English, and gave her money in grivnas.

We have noticed that there are ATMs on practically every block here, so running out of money is not as terrifying as we had anticipated. Most stores, though, do NOT take credit cards….if you’re coming, be prepared to carry cash and exchange money often!

We hung out for a little longer until Sasha picked us all back up and headed back to the orphanage. There, we met back up with Fred and Lisa’s driver, Kseniya, and the girls. Masha popped out in the same tiny top and shorts that she had been wearing earlier, so Mom and Kseniya suggested that she change into something with a little more fabric for the evening! I can’t wait until I have more input into the clothing options. I have no illusion that I can totally control what she wears, but I certainly hope to convey the message of what’s an appropriate choice and what is not!

At about 5:30, we were off, and 10 minutes later, we pulled up to the circus tent. Unlike Monday, people swarmed the field. Performers had little stands set up to sell trinkets, and the aerialist couple had a large swing suspended from the peak of the Little Top. For 5 grivna, kids could ride up to the top of the tent and back down.

The girls all bought little balls on rubber bands, and a little light-up thing. It’s interesting to watch them all discuss amongst themselves and agree on what will be purchased, and then all get the same thing…they are very good at reaching agreements, but they don’t seem to realize that buying different things (or riding different rides) is even an option. They are sticking together!

Before we knew it, the show began. Masha asked to use the camera, and after a quick explanation from Kseniya, was swapping deftly between still photos and video mode. She filled up two 2GB memory cards before the show was over, and caught some decent video of several acts!

First to take the stage was the aerialist couple. Though not Cirque du Soleil, they were pretty entertaining. There was also an illusionist and a clown with a monkey (yes, Steve, we got video this time!). The girls had a great time, and were pretty interested in the whole show.

Our thoughts….If we heard a news report next week that the tent collapsed in horrible flames, we would say “yeah, that seems about right.” Not that we want anything to happen, but the whole place seemed to be an accident waiting to happen. A 4-year old child was able to shake the whole structure by swinging on a support post; a performer dumped broken glass all over the ground early in the performance, and the finale “spinning chamber of flames” looked about to topple over. The butane fumes from all the fire acts quickly filled our nostrils, and we were coated with dust before the show began. It’s how we would imagine a traveling circus from the 1940s.

Fun was had by all, but by the middle of the first act, all stomachs were rumbling. At intermission, we discovered that the only concession was a popcorn stand, which did nothing to satisfy our hunger. I produced an apple and a bag of chips from the Magic Mom Bag which kept Masha from dying of starvation (or so she says).

Ukrainians eat their main meal of the day at lunch, so most of the cafeterias do not keep food available late in the evening, and people tend to meet for drinks and light snacks rather than a heavy dinner late in the evening. Kseniya arranged for us to stop at a pizzeria on the way back to the orphanage, since it was about the only place we could be assured of getting food. We were all so tired that we almost collapsed on our plates, but Masha was also so hungry that she decided she wanted pizza and a salad. We ate pretty quietly, and then returned the girls to the orphanage WAY past their curfew! Advice to anyone who has the opportunity to take the kids to the circus…eat first!

Garbage Day

Tuesday, 5 June

This morning, we witnessed one of the strangest aspects of Ukrainian culture we’ve seen to date. There are no dumpsters in/around our apartment building, and it took us some time (and some interesting conversations) to figure out where to throw out our garbage. We finally found that in each stairwell, there is a chute, down which the garbage can be flung. This chute is not quite wide enough for a pizza box, we learned, and on our floor, there is a “pusher” for garbage that gets stuck.

Until today, we had no concept of what happened to the garbage once it was ingested by the Chute. Based on the recent smell in the stairwell, we suspected that it sat at the bottom until even the plastic decomposed. But today, we saw The Garbage Truck.

An orange and white truck appearing to date from Soviet times appeared below our apartment this morning, its top a gaping mouth awaiting a hearty meal of food scraps, used tissues, beer bottles and pizza boxes. The truck was equipped with a hydraulic “ladle” that extended from its underbelly to the service door at the bottom of the stairwell.

At each stop (four in our building), a Refuse Collection Professional opens the service door and begins to scoop. Yes, I said scoop. We watched him alternate between a cardboard box and a rusty metal washbucket, shoveling garbage out of the Chute and into the truck’s bucket. Once all the debris was removed, the Refuse Vehicle Operator engaged the hydraulics, and the arm raised the bucket high above the gaping mouth, and then tipped to empty into the hungry hole as the truck slowly crept to the next stairwell.

Our apartment is on the 8th floor, and we could smell it all happening.

Nothing could top this for excitement, but it was a good day. We met up with Fred and Lisa and their girls and went to Amstor for lunch, where the girls discovered the video department, and excitedly inspected the titles available for Mom and Dad to say “Nyet” to. Then on to the Crocodile Park for a couple of hours.

The weather has now improved to “Perfect.” It was sunny and mid-70s, so we decided to spend 2 ½ hours in the park. Up until today, every time we’ve come to the park, we’ve been challenged with the girls asking to go on ride after ride, and for treat after treat. Today, we had a “parent conference” as we arrived at the park, and decided that it was time for a lesson in responsibility. We gave each of the girls 20 grivna (that’s about $4) and explained that they could decide how to spend it, but that was all for today, and it had to cover rides and treats.

They looked at each other and then began to strategize. We were a little concerned that Khrystyna, being the youngest and a little scattered, might immediately lose her money. But we were happy to be wrong about that. They were all exceptionally responsible, they budgeted their money, rode the rides they all agreed on, and handed their valuables to the Dads when they got on the Crocodile.

They had enough left over to get the ice creams that they wanted (and a couple of lollipops, too), and then they asked to go to the playground for the last hour because they were out of money. No begging for more, no “Pleeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaassse,” no eyelash batting. It was a resounding success, and it gives us great hope for the future.

One other item of note: when Lisa was running all three girls through flash cards at lunch and again at snack time, Masha was on top of them! And then while we were on the playground, Masha and Khrystyna were both swinging and they started hollering at each other “Crazy Khrystyna!” “Crazy, crazy Masha!” and then started calling each other various animal names…in English! “Cow Khrystyna…Pig Khrystyna…horse, dog, cat, ELEPHANT KHRYSTYNA!” Masha was rattling off more English than we had heard since the beginning of the trip, and both girls were laughing and having a ball! There’s a lot more in there than anyone suspected…

We’re finding through our recent park adventures is that the girls actually do better with us and with using their English when we do not have a translator with us. Necessity brings it out; when a translator is present, the girls gravitate toward her and are not inclined to make the effort to communicate directly with us. Although the first couple of visit on our own were a little challenging, all the girls seem to be relating much better to us as parents when we don’t have a translator around.

Further, both Masha and Amina have shown some concern about learning English, but the past few days have also done a lot to increase their confidence. They are learning a lot, and will learn much more once they are in America. They are like little sponges!

Around 4:00, we headed back, dropped the girls off, and then spent an hour in the internet café before returning home. Mark walked to the store while I read a bit, and then we had dinner and watched a movie. Have I mentioned that we watch a lot of movies? :-)