Day 1 and 2 – Sunday, 13 December and Monday, 14 December
All packed and out the door on time…we arrived at the Fort Wayne airport in time to discover that our originating flight was delayed, but only by 30 minutes. With 4 hours in Detroit, we had plenty of slack. No worries! We checked our luggage, hung out with Masha for a few extra minutes, then cleared security and the trip was on….
Our first flight carried us to Detroit in a whopping 26 minutes…by far the shortest leg of our journey. The next flight, Detroit to Amsterdam, was scheduled to depart at 9:55 PM, and pushed back right on time. After a short wait for de-icing, the plane lifted off and we said “пака” to the United States. Eight grueling hours and two inedible meals later, we landed in The Netherlands just 15 minutes before boarding began for our next flight to Kyiv! I quickly dropped into “run for your flight” mode, with Mark scrambling to keep up…I don’t think he’s ever seen me move that fast before!! Fortunately, Schipol airport is easy to navigate, and we arrived at our next gate with time to spare. Board and relax for our final 2.5 hour flight to Kyiv.
As we approached Kyiv about 4:30 in the afternoon, the first thing we noticed was that it was pitch dark. Kyiv is quite a bit further north than Fort Wayne, and it gets dark early here! After landing, we queued up in a long line for immigration, and then on to customs. While I filled out the customs forms, Mark went to collect our luggage. He quickly deposited one of our bags at my feet, but a few minutes later he came back with a concerned look…our other two bags were not anywhere to be found. The good news: the bag we had contained all the gifts we had carried for everyone else. The bad news: the missing bags contained all our own clothes and our US to European power adapter! Fortunately, the risk manager in me came through—I had our first three days of essentials (including dress clothes and shoes for our SDA appointment) in a rollerbag that we carried with us.
The lost luggage line didn’t seem all that long, only about 5 people ahead of us. But it was nearly an hour later when I was able to get in and speak with one of the agents. I handed over my bag claim tags (thank goodness I kept them!) and she began staring intently at her computer. I filled out 20 minutes worth of new customs forms and forms authorizing them to clear the luggage through customs and deliver it to us.
One thing we learned on our first trip to Ukraine was to trust our facilitator and go with the flow. Many arrangements are made on the fly, and the Ukrainian method of information sharing is quite different from ours. Because of this, when we landed in Kyiv we had no idea where we would be staying, we just knew we would be taken care of. So imagine my dread when I arrived at the “Delivery address” field on the lost luggage claim form! Fortunately, we did have our facilitator’s cell phone number, so I put that on the form and hoped that they would call him to find out where to bring our bags, if they ever found them….
Forms completed and signed, we cleared customs and finally saw a familiar face--one of the drivers that had helped us last time. He quickly grinned and waved to us. We also met our facilitator/translator for this trip. We quickly loaded into the van, and headed toward town.
On the way to the apartment, we stopped at a supermarket, where we were able to exchange money, get a SIM card for our phone, and get some basic groceries. While perusing the aisles, we remembered the amazing fruit juices that are available here, and also the tremendous variety of frozen pelemeni and vereneki. It was hard to choose just one or two!!
Finally, our shopping was complete and we piled into the car and drove to our apartment. Our translator helped us carry our few bags and groceries up to the apartment, showed us around, and then left us on our own around 8:00 PM. We had been travelling for 22.5 hours, and had been awake for almost 30. We quickly boiled some pelemeni and ate in a daze, then showered.
Our final surprise for the evening was the discovery that the little bag with Mark’s iPod and iPhone were not in my purse…I couldn’t imagine them being stolen from my bag—there was no way to know what was in the bag, and there were other valuable things in my purse that were more visible (like my laptop, blackberry, my iPod) that were all still there. After some very painful thought, I concluded they could have fallen out of my bag in the car. We called our translator, and she called our driver, but unfortunately he had dropped the car off at the garage, and couldn’t look for the phone until the morning. Oh. And as we were calling around with our translator, we discovered that the unlocked phone we had brought with us would only work on speakerphone. DOH!
We went to bed with a sense of loss…lost luggage, lost phone, lost sleep…but we are here, safe, and about 6,000 miles closer to our new daughter. That’s what counts.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Is Masha going with you?
No, unfortunately, we were not able to bring her for the adoption trip. We will be gone for at least three weeks, and she can’t miss school. Also, more importantly, this trip is not a vacation. The business and the logistics of the trip make it very difficult to accommodate extra people. Most of the cars are barely large enough to carry Mark and I, our driver, our facilitator, and Lena. Bringing even one extra person (and that person’s luggage) would push us to need two cars and also would require special lodgings as well…most of the apartments are not set up to accommodate extra children either. Further, a lot of our time is spent waiting around in cars, offices, hallways, etc. and after about the first 10 minutes, she would start getting bored and frustrated.
So, much as she would love to go, Masha will not be joining us on the trip. Instead, she will be staying at home. Our friend Anna and her daughter Gracie have graciously agreed to stay at our house while we are gone, so that Masha can keep to her normal schedule. Thanks, Anna and Gracie!!!!
So, much as she would love to go, Masha will not be joining us on the trip. Instead, she will be staying at home. Our friend Anna and her daughter Gracie have graciously agreed to stay at our house while we are gone, so that Masha can keep to her normal schedule. Thanks, Anna and Gracie!!!!
Sunday, November 29, 2009
At Last….
No beating around the bush…We have finally been invited to travel to Ukraine for our second adoption!!
As I mentioned in my last post, we were hoping to travel to Ukraine in late fall to begin the local process to adopt Lena. Well, ever the literalist, God has organized the timing so that we travel in the final week of fall—we leave on 13 December, just a week before the first day of Winter.
As with Masha’s adoption, the first step of the process is a meeting on Wednesday, the 16th in Kyiv with the State Department of Adoptions (SDA). The SDA manages all adoptions within Ukraine, both domestic and international. In order to protect the children and maintain a manageable process, the Ukrainian system operates on a “blind referral” system. This means that children cannot be matched with parents for adoption before the adoptive parents travel to Ukraine and meet with the SDA. In cases where parents wish to request the adoption of a child that they’ve previously met (like on a previous trip or through a hosting program), this meeting is the first and only opportunity to request a referral for that particular child. While there is a small chance that the SDA will not approve our request, we don’t foresee any significant issues.
Following that meeting (and the first of many sets of paperwork), we will travel to the region in southeastern Ukraine and begin the local process for adoption. If all goes well, we will arrive on Friday morning, and will finally see Lena and be able to hold her in our arms again!
As wonderful as it will be to see her again, our primary focus over the next several days will be on obtaining all the necessary permissions and executing documentation in preparation for our local court hearing. Typically, the court hearing is held about a week after the parents’ arrival in the region. In our case, we expect a little bit of extra documentation, but we are praying to have our court hearing completed by the 29th. It is important to understand that scheduling is a little less precise and rigid than in the US; some of you may remember that we had less than an hour’s notice for our hearing last time? http://nilesfamily.blogspot.com/2007/05/court.html
Following the court hearing, there is a mandatory 10-day appeal period. This appeal period must end on a business day; if the 10th day falls on a weekend, we must wait through the following Monday, and the final court judgment can be retrieved (and we can take custody of Lena) on Tuesday. For several reasons, local accommodations and extreme parental boredom included, parents are discouraged from remaining in Ukraine during the appeal period. You may recall that we stayed last time, but after living through that during *good* weather, we realize the wisdom in returning home, especially during winter!
Because of the holidays, we had to book our return flights for very early on the morning of New Year’s Eve. If we can’t make it to Kyiv in time for that flight, we’ll be stuck there through the middle of the next week!
While both parents must be present for the court hearing, only one is required to take custody and do all of the “outprocessing.” This includes obtaining a new birth certificate and passport, as well as collecting all the appropriate immigration paperwork at the US embassy in Kyiv. The current plan is for Christine to return to Ukraine and take care of all of this while Mark stays home with Masha.
Beyond our firm departure for Kyiv on the evening of the 13th, and our appointment with the SDA on the 16th, all dates are subject to change. We have learned to trust our facilitators and translators, knowing that they are as motivated as we are to get us back home…but it also means that we have no control and very little information about the timelines until events actually unfold.
Our travel anxiety is much lower. We have the advantage of being familiar with the city and understanding the basic process. We know that we can pack light, as we can buy almost anything we need in the local grocery stores. We expect to have Internet access from our apartment via broadband card (thanks to the Stillwells!!). I have already started loading up my e-reader with the many books I’ve been meaning to read (recommendations, anyone?), and getting the iPods updated with some new tunes. We will probably carry more weight in personal electronics than in clothes!!
Regardless, there are still many things to take care of before we leave, most importantly, the Care and Feeding of the Mashroom! We have a dear family friend who has graciously agreed to stay at our house with Masha so she can keep her routine close to normal while we are gone. Anna, you and Gracie are true blessings to us! We are diligently preparing house manuals and schedules, and trying to make this as easy as possible on everyone!
I’m not certain how much I’ll be able to post between now and our departure, but I’ll try to get a couple more posts up before we leave. Thanks to all of you for your endless support, prayers, and interest!!
As I mentioned in my last post, we were hoping to travel to Ukraine in late fall to begin the local process to adopt Lena. Well, ever the literalist, God has organized the timing so that we travel in the final week of fall—we leave on 13 December, just a week before the first day of Winter.
As with Masha’s adoption, the first step of the process is a meeting on Wednesday, the 16th in Kyiv with the State Department of Adoptions (SDA). The SDA manages all adoptions within Ukraine, both domestic and international. In order to protect the children and maintain a manageable process, the Ukrainian system operates on a “blind referral” system. This means that children cannot be matched with parents for adoption before the adoptive parents travel to Ukraine and meet with the SDA. In cases where parents wish to request the adoption of a child that they’ve previously met (like on a previous trip or through a hosting program), this meeting is the first and only opportunity to request a referral for that particular child. While there is a small chance that the SDA will not approve our request, we don’t foresee any significant issues.
Following that meeting (and the first of many sets of paperwork), we will travel to the region in southeastern Ukraine and begin the local process for adoption. If all goes well, we will arrive on Friday morning, and will finally see Lena and be able to hold her in our arms again!
As wonderful as it will be to see her again, our primary focus over the next several days will be on obtaining all the necessary permissions and executing documentation in preparation for our local court hearing. Typically, the court hearing is held about a week after the parents’ arrival in the region. In our case, we expect a little bit of extra documentation, but we are praying to have our court hearing completed by the 29th. It is important to understand that scheduling is a little less precise and rigid than in the US; some of you may remember that we had less than an hour’s notice for our hearing last time? http://nilesfamily.blogspot.com/2007/05/court.html
Following the court hearing, there is a mandatory 10-day appeal period. This appeal period must end on a business day; if the 10th day falls on a weekend, we must wait through the following Monday, and the final court judgment can be retrieved (and we can take custody of Lena) on Tuesday. For several reasons, local accommodations and extreme parental boredom included, parents are discouraged from remaining in Ukraine during the appeal period. You may recall that we stayed last time, but after living through that during *good* weather, we realize the wisdom in returning home, especially during winter!
Because of the holidays, we had to book our return flights for very early on the morning of New Year’s Eve. If we can’t make it to Kyiv in time for that flight, we’ll be stuck there through the middle of the next week!
While both parents must be present for the court hearing, only one is required to take custody and do all of the “outprocessing.” This includes obtaining a new birth certificate and passport, as well as collecting all the appropriate immigration paperwork at the US embassy in Kyiv. The current plan is for Christine to return to Ukraine and take care of all of this while Mark stays home with Masha.
Beyond our firm departure for Kyiv on the evening of the 13th, and our appointment with the SDA on the 16th, all dates are subject to change. We have learned to trust our facilitators and translators, knowing that they are as motivated as we are to get us back home…but it also means that we have no control and very little information about the timelines until events actually unfold.
Our travel anxiety is much lower. We have the advantage of being familiar with the city and understanding the basic process. We know that we can pack light, as we can buy almost anything we need in the local grocery stores. We expect to have Internet access from our apartment via broadband card (thanks to the Stillwells!!). I have already started loading up my e-reader with the many books I’ve been meaning to read (recommendations, anyone?), and getting the iPods updated with some new tunes. We will probably carry more weight in personal electronics than in clothes!!
Regardless, there are still many things to take care of before we leave, most importantly, the Care and Feeding of the Mashroom! We have a dear family friend who has graciously agreed to stay at our house with Masha so she can keep her routine close to normal while we are gone. Anna, you and Gracie are true blessings to us! We are diligently preparing house manuals and schedules, and trying to make this as easy as possible on everyone!
I’m not certain how much I’ll be able to post between now and our departure, but I’ll try to get a couple more posts up before we leave. Thanks to all of you for your endless support, prayers, and interest!!
Saturday, July 11, 2009
...And we're at it again!
After a lengthy hiatus to attend to life, the Niles Blog has returned!!
As many of you are aware, we have begun the process to adopt again! Over the next few weeks, I'll fill in the gaps over the past year, and share where we are in the process and what we expect to happen over the next few months. But for those of you clamoring for an update....
While we were in Ukraine to adopt Masha in June 2007, we met her best friend, Lena. She was a very sweet and soft-hearted girl, always there with a smile and a hug. We would have adopted her on the spot if we could, but we learned that her family situation was such that she was not available for adoption. Masha remained in touch with her after we returned to the US, calling and sending letters and photos.
Over time, we learned that the Center (orphanage) was working through the legal details to allow Lena to be adopted, but we understood that process was very long, involved, and often unsuccessful. While we had hope for her to eventually become part of a forever family, we committed to stay in touch with her and share our love with her regardless of what happened.
Fast forward to August 2008, when we had the opportunity to host Lena for a 2-week visit in our home. We knew that her opportunities to participate in hosting programs was pretty limited, and we wanted to give her a chance to travel to the US, visit with our family, and shower her with love for the time that we could. After some very chaotic travel arrangements, she arrived in mid-August and returned at the end of the month.
And no, i did not blog. :(
As she was packing to return to Ukraine, though, we learned that there had been a significant change in her status, and that she had been declared adoptable by the Ukrainian court system!! We rejoiced, but definitely recognized that there were still many hurdles to clear before she could become part of our family, including a 14-month waiting period before she would be eligible for adoption to a country outside Ukraine.
We began the process to update our Home Study (the first step in any adoption process), and learned that new State requirements meant we had to obtain some additional background checks through the appropriate Child Protective Services division of each state that Mark or I had lived in. A couple of mine took MONTHS to come back, and so our update took MUCH longer than our original homestudy.
As soon as we got the homestudy documents, we were able to move to Step 2: submit our application to US Citizenship and Immigration Services (CIS). We submitted that about three weeks ago, and we have an appointment to be a guest in their Indianapolis office to take our fingerprints and verify that our fingers haven't changed since last time we did this....
It generally takes them another 4 weeks to do what they do, so we hope to have their approval by the end of August. While they process our application, we will use the time to collect the many many other documents that Ukraine requires for us to submit as our application to adopt.
Just as with Masha, there is a risk that a Ukrainian family could choose to adopt Lena before she becomes available for international adoption. there is also a risk that we could be denied by the US or Ukrainian governments. While all of these risks are small, we are still praying that all goes smoothly!
If everything goes according to plan, we hope to be invited to travel to Ukraine late this fall.
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Eight Months
Winter is heaving-to. It has clearly decided that it’s not going anywhere, and in the meantime, it’s going to have a bit of fun with us. In typical Midwest fashion, we’ve experienced the battle between Canada and the Gulf of Mexico, throwing their separate weather patterns at us and laughing as they wreak havoc on our lives and plans.
After a couple of 55-degree days a couple weeks ago, accompanied by flooding worthy of a live remote on Good Morning America, we are again looking at a blanket of fresh snow and sub-zero wind-chills. God has thumbed his nose at the school system’s allotted number of snow-days, and they have begun tacking time onto the end of the kids’ sentence. The school year has been extended one day…so far. Any more snow-days, and our first summer vacation will be in jeopardy.
Masha takes it all in stride. The Winter Meltdown retreat brought kids from three churches together with the staff from our new “positive” radio station (www.remedy.fm check it out – great mix of rock, hip-hop, and alternative with none of the toxicity that is soaked throughout the mainstream media!!) for a weekend of fun and fellowship in southern Michigan. She had a great time; the highlight seemed to be an afternoon of Extreme Sledding.
She has continued to excel in school. Her teachers are all working hard with her, and she’s catching up to her class more quickly than anyone expected. Her homeroom teacher believes that she’s learning English quicker than normal, and we believe him. She understands most casual conversation now; while we still run into new words, she is more and more able to figure them out through context. She constantly comes home with new phrases…her current favorite word is “seriously.” “Seriously, Dad, the dog is stinky.”
I have never seen a kid work so hard at schoolwork. It’s a challenge to get her started, but once she has some momentum, she can’t stop until she’s all done. Recently, we were looking up vocabulary words in the dictionary. And yes, I am making her use a REAL dictionary. With pages. And a cover. Like…a BOOK NOT typing the word into dictionary.com and seeing what comes up! What a horrible, horrible monster I am! Or so I’ve been told. But I digress…
Recently we were looking up vocabulary words at the kitchen table. We had a few minutes as Mark was finishing up dinner, so I figured we could get about half of them done. She fought me on looking them up, but after the first couple, she got in the groove. We were starting on #5 when Mark announced dinner. He set the table around us; she moved the silverware away. He put her plate of roast chicken ON the open dictionary; she handed it to me. I had to take the dictionary away so she would eat. She was late to Campus Life because we needed to finish. I can honestly say I never cared that much about my homework!!
In school, she is gaining more confidence and grasping more each day. She even volunteered to read out loud with her reading group last week!!
Overall, we could not be more proud of her. Of course we have 13-year-old moments. We have times when her plans clash with ours. She sometimes perceives our home as a democracy rather than a benevolent dictatorship. But Masha is a good girl. Open-hearted, kind, and generous. We watched a movie last night with a teenage girl who, when talking to her mother, called her father “your husband.” Masha was baffled. “Why does she call him this? He’s her father. She should call him Dad. That is not nice.” She deals with anger much more constructively that I do, and I’m learning from her. And she always apologizes. On her own.
God has blessed us indeed!
After a couple of 55-degree days a couple weeks ago, accompanied by flooding worthy of a live remote on Good Morning America, we are again looking at a blanket of fresh snow and sub-zero wind-chills. God has thumbed his nose at the school system’s allotted number of snow-days, and they have begun tacking time onto the end of the kids’ sentence. The school year has been extended one day…so far. Any more snow-days, and our first summer vacation will be in jeopardy.
Masha takes it all in stride. The Winter Meltdown retreat brought kids from three churches together with the staff from our new “positive” radio station (www.remedy.fm check it out – great mix of rock, hip-hop, and alternative with none of the toxicity that is soaked throughout the mainstream media!!) for a weekend of fun and fellowship in southern Michigan. She had a great time; the highlight seemed to be an afternoon of Extreme Sledding.
She has continued to excel in school. Her teachers are all working hard with her, and she’s catching up to her class more quickly than anyone expected. Her homeroom teacher believes that she’s learning English quicker than normal, and we believe him. She understands most casual conversation now; while we still run into new words, she is more and more able to figure them out through context. She constantly comes home with new phrases…her current favorite word is “seriously.” “Seriously, Dad, the dog is stinky.”
I have never seen a kid work so hard at schoolwork. It’s a challenge to get her started, but once she has some momentum, she can’t stop until she’s all done. Recently, we were looking up vocabulary words in the dictionary. And yes, I am making her use a REAL dictionary. With pages. And a cover. Like…a BOOK
Recently we were looking up vocabulary words at the kitchen table. We had a few minutes as Mark was finishing up dinner, so I figured we could get about half of them done. She fought me on looking them up, but after the first couple, she got in the groove. We were starting on #5 when Mark announced dinner. He set the table around us; she moved the silverware away. He put her plate of roast chicken ON the open dictionary; she handed it to me. I had to take the dictionary away so she would eat. She was late to Campus Life because we needed to finish. I can honestly say I never cared that much about my homework!!
In school, she is gaining more confidence and grasping more each day. She even volunteered to read out loud with her reading group last week!!
Overall, we could not be more proud of her. Of course we have 13-year-old moments. We have times when her plans clash with ours. She sometimes perceives our home as a democracy rather than a benevolent dictatorship. But Masha is a good girl. Open-hearted, kind, and generous. We watched a movie last night with a teenage girl who, when talking to her mother, called her father “your husband.” Masha was baffled. “Why does she call him this? He’s her father. She should call him Dad. That is not nice.” She deals with anger much more constructively that I do, and I’m learning from her. And she always apologizes. On her own.
God has blessed us indeed!
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